DAILY REQUISITES IN UR RELATION

We all have needs.

Our bodies have needs. That is not what I would want to discuss here. :) That’s a completely different topic.

We also have other needs.

Emotional needs.

And these emotional needs must also be fulfilled each day if we are to maintain our emotional health.

We often go into relationships hoping that our new honey will satisfy those needs. Many of us actually won’t know what we need from the other person, but tend to realize it in course of time.  What we later discover is that we are ultimately responsible for pursuing our own emotional needs. It’s just nice if we can share that pursuit with someone special.

Nevertheless, there are 18 minimum daily requirements for your emotional health, that I consider non-negotiable for maintaining a solid relationship with your partner – or with anyone else for that matter.

The 18 are:

• Good will from your partner.
• Emotional support from your partner. A feel that you are their main priority.
• Be heard by your partner and to be responded to with respect and acceptance
• Have your own view, even if your partner has a different view.
• Have your feelings and experience acknowledged as real.
• Receive a sincere apology for any jokes or actions you find offensive.
• Clear, honest and informative answers to questions about what affects you.
• Freedom from accusation, interrogation and blame.
• Freedom from criticism and judgment.
• Have your work and your interests respected.
• Receive encouragement.
• Freedom from emotional and physical threat.
• Freedom from angry outburst and rage.
• Freedom from labels which devalue you.
• Be respectfully asked rather than ordered.
• Have your final decisions accepted.

• Space from previous affairs & relations. Not every person can take memories positively
• Privacy at times.

When a relationship lacks one or a few of these minimum daily emotional requirements, problems erupt.  The more that are missing, the bigger the eruption.

Is this all you need?  Well, personally, I want much more.  I want intimacy, closeness, passion, fun, excitement, fantasy, imagination, discovery, and more.

Everyone will probably have your own list of relationship wants.

Still, if these 18 minimum daily emotional requirements are not being met in your relationship, perhaps you need to look for the rest of your wants somewhere else.

Disclaimer: I’m blotting down things that I feel are right. :) Hope to help someone with this.

TOOTH ACHE

I lay in bed, I thought I was dead
But for the pain, I can't explain
The pounding dread, within my head
Why won't it wane, cries out my brain.

Broken filling, dental drilling
curse the bane, of toothache pain
I'd be killing, if God's willing
To cease refrain, of my molar pain.

I cry aloud, I am not proud
Down on my knees, Oh God help me please
To God I vowed, if he allowed
Relief to ease, the pain appease

I hear my peer, say to stop what he was to hear
Quit whining dear, or I do fear
I'll get a knife, to end your life
To me was clear, the end was near.

Break up Tips for the gals

So, you've been through a bad break-up, huh? Well, consider yourself one of many. And now, you want to get back into the dating game without all of the post break-up drama? Well, sit back, read this article, and take comfort in knowing that you are not alone.

1. Go into this new relationship cautiously and smartly. Take things very slowly, and don't let this new guy toy with you. Learn about all of guys' tricks. Don't be so gullible and believe him if he tells you he loves you- especially if it's very soon in the relationship that he tells you that he does. Do not, not, NOT let him take advantage of you. You're smarter than that, girl, and you know what signs to look for when it comes to being used and taken advantage of. Protect yourself, and don't be too trusting.

2. Don't go too fast. This is pretty much like number one. Don't make out with this boy the first time you guys hang out with each other. Wait until the time feels right; you will know. What's the fun of a relationship if you do everything right away? Then, there's nothing left to look forward too and get butterflies over, you know? Don't rush into things, and wait a while before sucking face-even if it kills you.

3. Do not believe the "I love you". That is the biggest tactic a boy uses on girls that makes girls feel weak in the knees and vulnerable. In some cases, that isn't true. Sometimes, you will actually find a good guy out there, who really means it when he says he loves you. But on most accounts, it's all part of the boys game. You can ask around if you don't believe me. And whatever happens, don't tell him you love him back UNLESS YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN THAT YOU DO! You've probably been there and done that before with the ex, remember? Girls don't want to have to go through that again.

4. Don't fall too hard again. Don't let this guy make you fall for him like you did for your ex-boyfriend. Know better and have some strength and self respect. Learn from the past. You can always take some good out of the bad.

5. Don't take compliments too personally. Boys love to offer girls compliments. It automatically gives them a one-way ticket to her heart. Girls love compliments, and they aren't a bad thing, but they can be annoying and they can be bad if they are over-used. Don't take them all to heart.

6. Don't let nerves take over you. Don't let this boy make you nervous! But if he does, try not to let it show that he makes you weak in the knees. I know that boys do that to girls because girls're only human, but they don't need to have the satisfaction of knowing that. If you can, try to make HIM sweat. Make that boy whipped. Whip him like Whipped Cream!

Tips

• Stay strong and stay true to yourself at all times.
• Don't let yourself get taken advantage of.
• Try not to turn all mushy and soft if you can help it, unless that's really what you want.
• Don't let your new relationship turn into a text message or an online relationship. Make sure this boy calls you and that you guys hang out! You deserve at least that much.

Warnings

• Don't be to dominant and push him away. That could end up in bad results, especially if you really like this boy.

Friendship

When we first spoke to each other
I knew we would be good friends.
Our friendship has kept on growing
And I'll be here for you to the end.

You listen when I have a problem
And help dry the tears from my face.
You take away my sorrow
And put happiness in its place.

We can't forget the fun we've had
Laughing til our faces turn blue.
Talking of things only we find funny
People think we're insane-If they only knew!

I guess this is my way of saying thanks
For catching me when I fall.
Thanks once again for being such a good friend
And being here with me through it all.

Being a mind reader

To have a successful marriage, one must know how to read minds.

My friend Varsha says she's still learning. When her husband walks into a room, looks blank, and turns his hands palms up, that means he has misplaced his cap.

She says, "It's in the bedroom on the bed post where you left it." He nods yes and hurries to retrieve it.

Husbands and wives send those mind messages to each other all the time.

When he walks into the house and announces "I only have two hands" that means he needs her to come outside and help him with his latest project.

When he asks if she wants him to run out and get some carryout’s for supper, what he's really saying is that he's getting hungry and wants her to start cooking,

When she says not to bother buying her a birthday present, he'd better bother.

My friend Varsha hinted for a ruby ring for her birthday. Instead he bought her a nice purse. Days later she was still mad. He wanted to know what was wrong. "You know perfectly well what's wrong," she said, but he didn't have a clue. He was supposed to read her mind.

When he comes in from work and says, "My feet are killing me," she knows what he's thinking. He isn't going to take her bowling/dancing/dining. Don't bother to suggest it.

She tells him he didn't take out the trash. He says she never told him to. She responds by saying, "Do I have to tell you everything?" He answers, "I can't read your mind."

He reads her mind loud and clear when she starts slamming cabinet doors and banging pots and pans. She's upset and he'd better be finding out why. But she's not talking.

There are ways to improve communication in marriage. Mind reading isn't one of them.

Don't ever try to read your spouse's mind or guess at his or her motives.

If you want to know your spouse's motives or thoughts, ask.

Assume the positive, not the negative.

Don't hint. Dropping hints is asking for eventual trouble.

Say what you mean. It's good to make one's wishes known in a tactful way, but be clear and don't force your spouse into trying to read your mind.

Everyone is given the gift of speech and we just need to use it.

No one can make many mind readers. It didn't take a rocket scientist to read Varsha's mind, but God didn't make many rocket scientists either.