We all have needs.
Our bodies have needs. That is not what I would want to discuss here. :) That’s a completely different topic.
We also have other needs.
Emotional needs.
And these emotional needs must also be fulfilled each day if we are to maintain our emotional health.
We often go into relationships hoping that our new honey will satisfy those needs. Many of us actually won’t know what we need from the other person, but tend to realize it in course of time. What we later discover is that we are ultimately responsible for pursuing our own emotional needs. It’s just nice if we can share that pursuit with someone special.
Nevertheless, there are 18 minimum daily requirements for your emotional health, that I consider non-negotiable for maintaining a solid relationship with your partner – or with anyone else for that matter.
The 18 are:
• Good will from your partner.
• Emotional support from your partner. A feel that you are their main priority.
• Be heard by your partner and to be responded to with respect and acceptance
• Have your own view, even if your partner has a different view.
• Have your feelings and experience acknowledged as real.
• Receive a sincere apology for any jokes or actions you find offensive.
• Clear, honest and informative answers to questions about what affects you.
• Freedom from accusation, interrogation and blame.
• Freedom from criticism and judgment.
• Have your work and your interests respected.
• Receive encouragement.
• Freedom from emotional and physical threat.
• Freedom from angry outburst and rage.
• Freedom from labels which devalue you.
• Be respectfully asked rather than ordered.
• Have your final decisions accepted.
• Emotional support from your partner. A feel that you are their main priority.
• Be heard by your partner and to be responded to with respect and acceptance
• Have your own view, even if your partner has a different view.
• Have your feelings and experience acknowledged as real.
• Receive a sincere apology for any jokes or actions you find offensive.
• Clear, honest and informative answers to questions about what affects you.
• Freedom from accusation, interrogation and blame.
• Freedom from criticism and judgment.
• Have your work and your interests respected.
• Receive encouragement.
• Freedom from emotional and physical threat.
• Freedom from angry outburst and rage.
• Freedom from labels which devalue you.
• Be respectfully asked rather than ordered.
• Have your final decisions accepted.
• Space from previous affairs & relations. Not every person can take memories positively
• Privacy at times.
• Privacy at times.
When a relationship lacks one or a few of these minimum daily emotional requirements, problems erupt. The more that are missing, the bigger the eruption.
Is this all you need? Well, personally, I want much more. I want intimacy, closeness, passion, fun, excitement, fantasy, imagination, discovery, and more.
Everyone will probably have your own list of relationship wants.
Still, if these 18 minimum daily emotional requirements are not being met in your relationship, perhaps you need to look for the rest of your wants somewhere else.
Disclaimer: I’m blotting down things that I feel are right. :) Hope to help someone with this.
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